It might just be me
ok, it usually is just me, but for the sake of argument, play along
but I have noticed a lot of people slow walking along the streets of my town.
Not walking.
S-L-O-W walking.
Like one foot directly in front of the other foot at a snail's pace.
It.
Is.
Creepy.
Now, before, I get people's defenses up,
I am NOT
talking about the people who physically can't walk fast.
Like the sweet old man that walks with his walker and his nurse every day down my street.
I want to give him a big ol' "Atta Boy!" out the window of my car, but I am
afraid it will startle him into a fall or cardiac arrest.
No, I am talking about the nothing-wrong-with-me
(physically)
people that just all sneaky creep
s-l-o-w
walk.
I am not even talking about the lazy or just plain exhausted people.
Because you can kinda get that by their sagging shoulders
and head hanging low in resignation.
No.
This is different.
It is one foot directly in front of the other.
Almost delicate in its placement.
And they are looking around.
All creepy like.
[shiver shudder]
I am dead serious.
Every time!
There is a guy that slow walks down our street every mid-morning.
And I don't know who it is.
I want go out and sit in MY red Adirondack chair
(I say MY because my dad made one with a curvy comfy seat for me and a deep straightish seat for Monte. They are awesome. Like our own Papa Bear and Mama Bear seats.)
And ask
(there would be plenty of time).
But here's the thing:
I REALLY think he might have a knife.
Not a gun.
(Guns are a runner's game).
He's a S-L-O-W walker.
They carry knives.
Or even ropes
or heavy pieces of pipe.
I don't want to find out for sure.
So I don't sit out on MY red Adirondack chair and wait for him.
Once I pointed out ALL
(I swear, there are more than you can imagine!)
slow walkers creeping along the streets
like zombies in a Michael Jackson video
Monte was amazed.
So he decided to do a little experiment.
He works in a brand new building.
With a beautiful marble-floored lobby.
He decided to do a little
S-L-O-W walking
himself.
To see if anyone would notice.
He CREEPED himself out!!
A few steps in and he had to stop.
[shiver shudder]
It's just not right.
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