Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

I Want Candy…?!


Right after Easter?

No, I did not buy Big Binks for McDaniel.
This was a wishful thinking photo.

Did you know that TODAY is National Jelly Bean Day??

My favorite jelly bean colors.
I think that means I should be getting a big bag for free 
since I MUST be their product’s biggest supporter 
(except for the past few months when I took a break--
which probably showed up in a dip in sales).

The knowledge that it is National Jelly Bean Day has inspired me to write about my favorite candies.

 I know how deeply you must care about my candy desires.

My Top 10 Favorite Candies

1. Jelly Beans. Duh. But they must be your run of the mill jelly beans. Not jelly bellies or gourmet or tropical flavors or Jolly Rancher brand. Just jelly beans. I eat only 3 colors and in this order:  white, pink and then purple. [See picture above]. Monte only eats the green, yellow and orange. So we never fight over beans (and that would be a completely justifiable fight.) But we do always end up with a bowl of black and red beans to toss. 

2.  Candy Corn. It is always a happy day when I see the first bag of candy corn being put out in late summer. 

Hello, old friend!
My girlfriend got us a candy corn shaped basket to house our stash 
that remains out from September through November. 

Another girlfriend got me a candy corn necklace that I wear with pride.

Candy corn necklace selfie.

3. Laffy Taffy. This is usually just a traveling candy. Meaning we only buy it when we are on road trips. The not-funny jokes printed on each wrapper are good time passers and more times than not, I can guess the answers. Which says a lot about my sense of humor.

Pick Your Plum, which I’ve mentioned before, is a great website of discount products and they always include a Laffy Taffy in their packaging.

Well, when I recently received the metal monogram I had ordered, there was NO Laffy Taffy!

Cool monogram but Laffy Taffyless.

I expressed my concern to Julie who had also ordered a metal monogram. She sent me this picture to assure me it was JUST ME and they had not abandoned their Laffy Taffy-in-every-package policy.

Julie’s finger pointing all cocky at her Laffy Taffy.

 It must’ve been an oversight. 
If it happens again, I will send a desperately worded email. 

4. Werther’s chewy caramels.  

Yes, just the chewy ones. I have a fear of choking on hard candies and being alone when I am choking on hard candies and then having to rush around, without air, looking for something to ram my diaphragm into so I could expel the hard candy from my air passageway. To avoid all this, I stick with chewy candies.

5.  Reese’s Pieces.  

But only if we have vanilla ice cream. I am not one to just eat Reese’s Pieces plain like E.T. Not sure I can really expound on why but they need vanilla ice cream.

6.  Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. 

Only if they are mini and only if they are frozen. Since I don’t like chocolate, freezing them makes the chocolate flavor more acceptable to me. I prefer they be mixed with vanilla ice cream too.

7. Gum Drops. 

I love the holiday gum drops that are shaped like bells that come out at Christmas time. They come in three flavors:  white, red and green. Again, I am only a white and red fan and Monte eats the green. Except this past holiday season I noticed that I got an excruciating headache every time I ate the red bells. What is up with that?! So now I am only a white bell eater. 

8. Peppermint Nougats.

I love these so much! 

My grandmother always kept a fancy candy dish of these out at Christmas. I don’t think I fully cultivated my love of them until I was an adult. We all love these--including the girls. FYI:  read the packaging closely so you don’t make the horrible mistake of bringing home 2 bags of spearmint nougats. They will make you wipe your tongue with a paper towel.

9.  Saltwater Taffy. 

I do love various flavors of taffy like vanilla, blueberry and caramel. The kind you can get at a bulk candy store, not the kind in a box from a souvenir shop on vacation. Unless you enjoy going to the dentist and getting a crown replaced.

10. Gum balls.

I know, I know, I jacked up my jaw and shouldn’t chew gum anymore. But I don’t everyday like I used to. Colorful gum balls are a rare treat for me. Last summer, I helped Sumita with her daughter’s graduation party and she had these blue and silver gum balls in large glass vases. 

Oh my goodness, the blue ones were amazing! 

As much as I like gum balls, Monte LOVES them. Until earlier this year when the glass dome got “mysteriously" broken, Monte had his own gum ball machine. Truth be told, and not by Monte, the glass dome was broken because he kept sticking his hand inside the too-small opening at the top of the dome instead of putting in a coin to get the gum as God intended. 

Anway, Carisa, Juan, Monte and I were sitting at a table in Sumita’s back yard at the graduation party, chewing on blue gum balls watching Monte spit a piece out, hurl it into the woods behind the house and pop in another. Carisa and I just kind of shrugged and did the same thing. 

More than once. 

Those blue gum balls lose their flavor fast.

A few days later, Sumita’s husband, Mark,  found all our bright blue already-chewed gum wads that didn’t make it as far into the woods as we thought. 


What’s your favorite candy?

The Liebers

Monday, April 21, 2014

Some Funny Things Happened When We Went Home For Easter

We drove to my small hometown in Indiana for Easter to spend it with my family.

We crammed a lot of visiting, 
and relaxing 
into the weekend.

My niece’s friend, Brittany is a master at
creative things like this.
Aren’t they adorable?

We found this big container waiting for us
in the kitchen.

Deliciousness! The whole mix was covered in
white chocolate. The secret special part was
that Brittany used white cheddar popcorn.

But we still managed to teach McDaniel to drive in the parking lot of the elementary school that I attended, where my mom taught 1st grade and where my father was the principal.

My niece graciously let us use her much more manageably sized car.

Monte giving McDaniel lots of instructions.

Before Monte gave McDaniel lots of instructions.

McDaniel’s first attempt at parking. She will not be
a parking lot favorite. 

I was a little “jarred” after I rode with her. She was not light of foot
with the brake or the gas going into a turn. I said, “Stoppy stoppy!” like
my mom. A lot.

We squeezed in a little bit of basketball after the driving lesson.

My new favorite picture.
I am not sure there is a better place from which to shoot hoops than barefoot in the bed of your late great-grandpa’s truck in the parking lot of the elementary school that your mother attended and where your grandparents both worked.

It doesn’t get more Hoosier than that.

We, (Monte, my dad, my brother Kwin and I) also managed to take a “walk” after breakfast Saturday morning that turned into a hike which turned into us getting lost on The Pinnacle Trail.

I have hiked The Pinnacle many times. 

But I have never hiked the Pinnacle without getting lost. 

The Pinnacle is not flat, paved or well marked. 

My dad “assured us” after walking 2 1/2 hilly miles, that our hike would be a “quick up and down”.

We emerged 3 hours later 
and limping. 

Well, I may have been the only one limping. 

And whining.

My dad didn’t even seemed winded.

The back of my knee still hurts.

And my “walk” this morning to my hair appointment 
ended up with a fire-like burning in my shins.

We also managed to attend a church with no screen, no drums and no electric guitars.

We sang “He Lives” holding hymnals accompanied by an organ played by a retired teacher who worked with my mom and dad and a piano played by my high school choir teacher.

We heard announcements like there were still homemade chocolate eggs for sale in the church basement that were made by the women, including my mom.

We brought some home for Ellie to share at bible study this morning.

We listened to a sermon by a preacher allergic to lillies from a pulpit covered in lillies.

We felt like rock stars as faces from my past came by to hug and smile and fuss over us.

A sweet old man told Monte that he hadn’t seen him since he was “yay big” holding his hand waist high.

Since I first brought Monte to my hometown in 1994 when he was 28 years old and fully grown, this made us smile.

We managed to put on a pretty competitive egg hunt with the ages of the hunters ranging from 11 to 21.

Notice Brittany’s “game face” complete with
eye black and a bandana.

Brittany found the one and only big egg.

Monte managed to sneeze a lot due to all the beautiful blooming everything.

The weekend was a wonderful mix of slowing down that went too fast. 

We didn’t want to come home.

It certainly helped that our Bradford Pear tree bloomed while we were away.

And a few tulips popped out.

And this beautiful azalea was waiting for us from a very unexpected source.

Above all else, it was great to celebrate our risen saviour,

who died for us, in the greatest expression of love,

with the ones that we love.

What did you do for Easter?

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Blogs I Love

As promised, here are some blogs that I consistently read and am excited when I see an email in my inbox that there is a new post.

Mindy at Dandelion Diary. Mindy is a dear writer and encourager. I have mentioned her on my blog before and consider her a friend even though we have never met. No word is every wasted with her. She is fabulous at finding things to be grateful for. Check out her 3-part series on going deep. So worth it. She’s funny, sweet and a true poet. Check out her latest poetic post about the lunar eclipse. It’s awesome!

Karmen at Praise the Lord & Pass the Calgon. God saw fit to put more than one Karmen with a ‘K’ in the blog world and then, just for kicks, connect them! It has been so fun “chatting” with Karmen and getting to know her. And it is so fun to leave her comments addressed to “Karmen”. She is another that I consider a friend without ever seeing her in person. Karmen is funny, introspective and always courageously transparent. She is in the very beginning of a thyroid cancer diagnosis. Her positive attitude (joy is how she said it to me just last night) is nothing short of God-given. And she is documenting it in her blog. Follow along and pray for this sweet sister.

Jenny Shrodes at Foodie RD. Jenny just happens to live a few doors down. Our kids have grown up around each other. We’ve even discussed the idea of bringing back arranged marriages for her son and my Ellie. It’s truly not a crazy idea. She is a dietitian who really aspires to eat cleanly and teach others to do the same. She is a fantastic cook! She teaches cooking classes and is on our local news regularly offering her wisdom and recipes. She is so good on camera! I love to watch and text her important comments like, "I have that belt!" Or “Great scarf!” Or “I laughed out loud when you pointed out that the hemp seeds went down the news anchor’s blouse!” You know, important feedback. She updates her Face Book page more often than the  blog: Watch the video on how to quickly separate egg yolks. Mind. Blowing.

Chris Carter at The Mom Cafe. Chris is THE greatest cheerleader EVER. Encouragement is her love language and she is flat-out fluent. She not only writes beautifully about her faith and family (you HAVE to read about her daughter’s health struggles and being on the swim team. HAVE to. A movie should be made. I cheered OUT LOUD reading it.) but she is constantly sharing writing from others. Promoting it. Us. She is just that rah-rah awesome. Read her post on the crucifixion. Stunning. And she is funny too. And she lives not far from me and I keep bugging her to meet for coffee. Not in a stalker way. Because she is another that I feel a friendship with without ever meeting. But we could meet. Should meet. Chris, am I scaring you?

Rabia at The Liebers. Rabia is quite funny. She was featured in an book of short essays by mom writers called The Mother of all Meltdowns. I have been linking to her blog for the Tuesday 10 writing prompts. I always enjoy her posts. 

Katy at Nobody Puts Katy in a Corner. This certainly isn’t a tiny blog but worth checking out if you haven’t yet. I know I have mentioned her before. This gal is HILARIOUS! She has her own theme song. And a puppet that looks like her. PLEASE read this post of what happened when her husband was pulled over late at night with her look-alike puppet sitting in the passenger seat. She is a Georgia girl with small children who just survived a Kansas winter. That DOES deserve a theme song, doesn’t it? Katy also is very transparent about her life, her faith and her marriage. And she makes hysterical videos. 

Darcy at Message In a Mason Jar. I am new to this blog but just love what I have read so far. Her latest post about Palm Sunday and the beach is so beautiful. Check it out! I can’t wait to read more from this talented writer.

Joni at Motherhood and Muffin Tops. Dear word, I love, this blog! She has just begun to blog and I heard about her through Sophie Hudson from Boo Mama. This girl has a way with words! Funny, sweet and spot on. I actually reposted her latest blog called Somewhere Along the Way on my Face Book page because it NEEDED to be shared. It was THAT good. Can I get an Amen!? Go to her blog right now and read it. Go.

Heidi at Trying Not 2 Blink. Heidi has this amazing run-on sentence all-in-one-breath style of writing that makes you feel like you are sitting right in front of her listening to her speak. I love it when she writes about substitute teaching. Cracks me up. She wrote this amazing account of how her little boys decided to “do church” when the family didn’t go to church one Sunday. One of the little boys put on a suit and preached from Genesis. It is just. precious! She titled the post “Bedside Baptist”. Go read it.

Donna at Holimess. Donna is such a lovely writer. Her faith oozes from her. She wrote this stunning post about a Google search that she noticed on the stats page of her blog. So beautiful how she witnesses through this post in the hopes that the person who typed in the particular search:  “I am tired of this life Lord” would get to read what she wrote. And how she prayed for them. I will never look at those Google searches on my blog the same.

Angel at Finding the Inspiring Angel consistently does just as the title of her blog states:  finds the inspiring. In her life and what’s happening around her. Check out her latest post about the Resurrection.

Hope you love these as much as I do! 

And if you do…leave them a comment to let them know. It means the world!

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Questions: Answered

I was given an honor in the form of a Liebster Award.

Along with that came a list of questions to answer by Rabia from over at The Liebers. She also asked me to share some of my favorite blogs I follow (the smaller great ones that are just waiting to be found, read and enjoyed). I will share those in another post.

Here are the questions she wanted me to answer:

•What is the funniest thing that has happened 
to you in the past week?


These are my party planning partners after I said, “Look off into the distance!” before our picture was taken at an event we planned last week. It makes me laugh every time I look at it. 
I’m in the middle all like, “Look!” 
Julie’s looking in the opposite direction like, “What? Where?” 
And then there is Sumita whose memorized
expression clearly says, “It’s soooooo beautiful!”
 to absolutely nothing. 
We were looking at nothing! 
Oscar worthy, I know.

•What is the first thing you do when you 
wake up in the morning? 

Go to the bathroom and wash my face. 
Drink my coffee if Monte is so inclined to bring it up to me.

Do you speak another language? If so, which? 
If not, what language would you like to learn? 

A little Spanish--from classes in high school. I can sing "Happy Birthday" in Spanish (which I did to myself at a restaurant in Mexico on my 40th birthday and the waiters didn’t even roll their eyes. Of course, one asked if I was 23, so maybe they were just after a sizable tip.) 

I bought these cassettes tapes to learn French before we went to Paris a million and a half years ago. All I really remember about them is that I was always asking Mr. Dupont where his hat was and where he put the cheese. Hopefully not in the same place. I never did meet Mr. Dupont while in Paris so I never found out.
I have no aspirations to learn another language. Right now. But if Monte announces tonight we are booked to go to Italy, I will certainly seek out CDs so I can ask Mr. Dupont where he put his cheese and hat in Italian. 

I think learning sign language would be cool.

In high school were you into sports, band, choir, 
art or something else? 

I was a cheerleader and in show choir. So I had pom poms and a sequined belt. 
I could do a toe touch and jazz hands. Not to brag.

If you were going to write a memoir, what would you call it? 

I’m kinda liking “Toe Touches and Jazz Hands” or “Who Moved Mr. Dupont’s Hat and Cheese?  And Other Important Questions Answered” but that’s just me spit balling and looking over what I just wrote 3 seconds ago. 

When you snack do you go for sweet, 
salty, fruity, or crunchy?

 I find this question cruel since I am in the homestretch of a self-imposed fast from jelly beans. Which in hindsight was not a smart thing to do at EASTER. All that to say, because I am not eating jelly beans, I have been craving salty. I’ve been digging popcorn and pistachios as of late. There’s another memoir title:  “Popcorn and Pistachios:  A Look Into My Life Without Jelly Beans”.

List three songs at the top of your play list lately. 

“Happy” by Pharrell Williams. I know. I KNOW. My daughters say it is overplayed. But I don’t care. It makes me happy to listen to it. Truly. And it makes me dance. And it makes me clap along because I feel like a room without a roof (even though I have no earthly idea what that means).

“Keep Making Me” by Sidewalk Prophets. The words are amazing. It had me at the first line:
“Make me broken so I can be healed.”

There is a tie for my third song:  “As Sure As the Sun” by Ellie Holcomb. Just love her voice--the way she sings in an almost whispery way.  And the way she says mercy. 

“Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)” by Hillsong. Oh my, I love this song. It is very calming to me. But it is long. I thought I had accidentally put it on some sort of repeat replay when I realized:  NOPE, it is just a l-o-n-g song! Worth every second.

Which of your parents do you think you are most like and why? 

A good mix of both. I can find the funny in things like my mom but I am not as tidy as her. I am creative like my dad but wish I could build things like him. But there is still time (for the building--being tidy just might be a lost cause).

If you could become a character on a TV show for a week, who would you choose to be? 

I would love to be Julia Sugarbaker from “Designing Women” and eloquently chew someone out in that polite gentile way. 

What is your favorite blog post that you've written?

I have lots of favorites! (Is that braggy to say that?) A stand out is "Care Taking" that I wrote about helping mishandling Carisa after her surgery. 
I also really liked, “This Is the Way, Walk In It.

Tell us something interesting going on in your life right now. 

I am trying to get a party planning business off the ground. 

Why wouldn’t someone hire us?!

Thanks to Rabia for honoring my blog!

Monday, April 14, 2014

Are You Willing?

It was Baptism Sunday at church yesterday.

I love those Sundays. 

I love hearing what each person has to say about why they decided to get baptized.

Our pastor is good to let them speak their heart.

Which isn’t treating baptism like a checklist.

This isn’t a legalistic to-do.

It is a public expression of a very personal relationship with Jesus.

And it is just precious.

I have to keep the tissues handy.

Yesterday one of the little girls I have taught in Sunday school and VBS, announced that she felt a “pulling in her heart" and wanted her mom to call the pastor about getting baptized.

She is 7.

The pastor and the little girl talked over the phone and when the mom got back on the line, the pastor heard the little girl in the background yell,


Isn’t that awesome?

Don’t you want that excitement?

A 6th grade boy, when asked by the youth pastor what he’d like to tell the congregation about his decision to accept Christ and also be baptized, said this:

“Don’t worry about me! I’m going to heaven when I die!”

He is 12.

Isn’t that so profoundly simple?

Don’t you want that kind of assurance?

“Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name, you are mine.”

--Isaiah 43:1

His confident statement has made me think of fear.

In my bible study we are talking about David and how he became angry and afraid of the Lord when Uzzah was suddenly killed on the spot for mishandling the Ark of the Covenant.

As a result of Uzzah’s death, 

David became “unwilling” the bible says, 

to have anything to do with the ark. 

So therefore, Obed-edom housed the ark for 3 months and his whole household was blessed.
(2 Samuel 6:6-11)

Someone posted this video on Facebook of these two foreign 70-year-old ladies flying in an airplane for the first time.

One was so completely fearful and full of anxiety that it is a bit shocking she was even willing to go. Her husband said they never were able to take vacations very far from home because of her fear of flying. 

She had been “unwilling” to face her fear.
 It was paralyzing.

The other woman, who did not previously know her flying companion, was a free-spirit, full of joy and laughter who had never even heard of the word turbulence.

Not fearful at all but still never flown on an airplane because her husband was terrified of heights and “unwilling" to fly. 

Watch what happens:

Isn’t this fascinating?

Don’t you want that sense of awe 
and excitement 
and anticipation?

Who would you rather be in this duo?

I’m Team Ria all the way! 

Anyone who laughs until 
their belly hurts has my vote!

Isn’t it interesting that An cried when she Face Timed her husband after the flight?

Do you think that her tears were in mourning of all her years of “unwillingness”?

And maybe the sting of embarrassment too?

I read in “Jesus Calling” this morning:

“The absolute certainty of your heavenly home give you Peace and Joy, to help you along your journey. You know that you will reach your home in My perfect timing:  not one moment too soon or too late. Let the hope of heaven encourage you, as you walk along the path of Life with Me."

I have no idea of Ria or An's faith, but I can see their “willingness".

And I want some of that, don’t you?

Wednesday, April 09, 2014

Riding a Horse on the Beach Is Not Like the Picture In Your Head

When we were researching things to do in Florida over Spring Break,

Monte mentioned that he saw advertisements for horseback riding on the beach.

Of all the seaside places that we have been to,

I have never seen people riding horses on the beach.

But I had a picture in my head of what it looked like.

After calling a stable and asking some questions, Monte decided he did not want to go horseback riding after all.

Beach regulations prohibited the horses from 
doing anything faster than walk.

For understandable reasons.

Monte said,

“I want to "Runaway Bride" it if I’m going to ride a horse.”

Wedding dress excluded, I’m sure.

I guess Monte had a picture in his head of what the whole thing should look like too.

Poor guy living with all us girls. 

He now speaks “Chick Flick”.

I blame myself.

So Monte deemed himself the photographer of me and the girls’ horse riding experience.

We met at a sandy park right on the water to fill out paperwork and get our horse assignments.

Highly recommend if you are in the
Cape San Blas area.

While we were waiting, McDaniel started bonding with a horse. 

Whenever she stopped scratching his nose, he’d nudge her to keep on scratching on. 

Just like our dog, Nigel.

McDaniel finished the ride with swollen red itchy eyes and a runny nose. 

Seems now horses goes onto to the list of things she is allergic too.
Along with cats and dogs that shed.

Instant buddies.

I have ridden a horse before and have a healthy respect for their strength and power and speed

 but never spent enough time around them to see all their playful dog-like behavior. 

It was like watching Maximus on Disney’s “Tangled".

Love that movie!

Except not animated.

When a guy from the stable came out to give us our horse assignments, 

McDaniel got paired with the horse she already bonded with named Lightning Bug. 
Bug for short.

He told us he was special because he was a mustang.

Of course, me and the girls put hand on heart thinking of the mustang in the movie, “Flicka”.

Tear-jerker movie, but good ending.

Ellie was instructed to ride Sassy.

Another perfect match!

One of the workers came over, looked Sassy right in the eye and said,

“You are not the boss. I AM. Got it? You are NOT the boss.”

Ahem. Can I get an AMEN from parents 
with tweens and teenagers?

I may make this part of our breakfast routine.

I got a gorgeous splotchy horse named Preacher who was prone to stop and eat everything so I was instructed to keep a close reign (literally) on him lest he be tempted.

There may be a sermon in that.

It was just an amazing experience! The sun was shining and there was the most pleasant breeze off the water.

Loved my view!

Oh, sweet beach, I miss you!

McDaniel in front of me had to make sure that Bug
didn’t get too close to Ellie. Sassy didn’t like to her
style cramped. Seriously?!
The horses wore bags so “their business” didn’t defile the beauty of the beach.

Except Sassy lifted her tail up high, bypassing the bag and did it right on the beach anyway.

Never once did I feel bored with the walking pace. 

The sand was uneven and the horses were good to 

avoid sandcastles 

and holes dug by kids 

and fishing poles stuck in the sand waiting for a bite.

And they must’ve been thoroughly trained on what to do with dogs.

On our way back to the park, 

a little black and brown dog, 
leash dragging behind him, 

sprung out of the dunes bullet fast. 

Two little boys, probably 5 and 9, ran like crazy to catch the dog’s leash. 

They’d get close, 

the dog would stop in an “about to pounce” stance 

and then take off again 
just as the boys dove head first 
to get the leash. 

They ran, 

they dove, 

they even threw a flip flop at the dog 

in an attempt to get him to stop.

Nothing slowed him down.
The horses all stopped. 

In a row. 

With heads turned, they watched, 

almost in amusement, 

as this little dog darted in and out of close proximity to them, 

barking his mischievous little head off.

The oldest boy finally caught the dog’s leash. 

I clapped and cheered. 

And the horses walked on.

Just fascinating that something so strong and powerful and fast could be trained to not be distracted by something so small but bent on being a nuisance.

Hmmmm. I might need to make that reminder a part of my breakfast routine too.

There was a time about 30 minutes into our walk that Monte and Dad came out onto the beach to watch us. We stopped for pictures.

Preacher and Bug were playfully butting heads. Sassy was careful to protect her personal space.

Preacher looks a little hungry.

Monte decided that if he wasn’t going to ride one,

he certainly needed a horse selfie.

Not your best side, Bug.

Monte and Preacher.
McDaniel and one ear and eye of Bug photo bomb.
Oh wait, there's me too!

Full-on photo bomb by Bug.

On our way back to the park after the fastest hour of my life,

I noticed the hoof prints from our trip out.

Love it.
Riding a horse on the beach far surpassed any picture I had in my head.

“Runaway Bride” didn’t even cross my mind.

Not even for a second.

But the beauty of God’s creation did.

More than once.

As soon as Preacher saw the dune grass as we left the beach, the temptation proved too great for him.

I had to pull the reigns back and be quite stern to keep him in line.

It was a battle.

I didn’t like it.

As soon as we got among the trees again,

Preacher went right up to a palm tree and started nibbling on its bark.

I pulled and nudged and said, “NO!" numerous times before the worker said,

“Kick him! It won’t hurt him, it’s for his own good!”

Well, you certainly don’t hear that in Parenting 101

or Christianity 101

but we probably should.

It’s for our own good.

Even if we don’t like it.