Wednesday, April 30, 2014

The Nesbitt



Back in January Monte announced that he knew what he wanted for his birthday

which is in February.

He briefly explained that he wanted a bracelet for fitness

or something.

What I heard was one of those bands that was supposed to keep you from falling down.

Which I am not even sorry to say is flat out stupid.

After several more explanations that it was not, in fact, a stupid so-you-won’t-fall-down bracelet,

he told me it was called a Fitbit,

****

which I could never remember,

and felt it was awkward to say,

so I started referring to it as a Nesbitt.


Not that I am AT ALL equating Monte wanting a rubber bracelet with Buzz Lightyear losing his arm, going a bit “bat crazy”, wearing a woman’s hat and calling himself Mrs. Nesbitt after a bit too much Darjeeling tea.

Ahem.

You are supposed to wear this Nesbitt like a watch and it monitors how many 

steps you take, 

calories you burn, 

miles you walk, 

stairs you climb 

and how restful your sleep is.

 Monte would roll over in the middle of the night, 

hit the button on the side of the Nesbitt, 

which illuminated the entire room with an eerie blue light, 

to see if he was getting enough restful sleep.


He was constantly telling me how many steps he took in a day.

When he didn’t get in what he thought was enough, 

he’d walk around the house until he did.

Which was confusing to the dog.

Who thought it was some really boring, 
repetitious game.

He ended up buying the Nesbitt for himself for his birthday

(once I found out it was over $100)

and gave it to himself early.

So for the past 4 months I have gotten daily reports on Monte’s wellness via the Nesbitt.

He synced it to the computer and everything.

Monte can get a wee bit overly excited about new technology.

He’s no early adapter (thank goodness) 

and he’s never camped out in line in front of an Apple store before 
a new something or other has been released.
(SUPER thank goodness!)

But his seemingly growing dependence on the reports from this little rubber bracelet was baffling and let’s be honest, annoying to me.

But he could be doing WAY worse things
 than being concerned about his health.

He could be growing a handlebar mustache,
planning for a zombie apocalypse,
wearing skinny jeans
or playing video games for hours every night.

I got a text from Monte last week while he was out of town on business that he lost his Nesbitt.

He was able to log onto his computer and see when the last “beam me up Scotty” transmission was.

7:45 am.

He figured he was just walking into the office. He looked all over the parking lot.

Even under cars.

He looked all over the office and had others help.

No Nesbitt.

He was sad.

I should have suggested some 
Darjeeling tea over the phone.

Once he was back home from the trip, he got a call that his Nesbitt had been found,

this past Monday,

in the parking lot of the office building.

That means the Nesbitt potentially sat in that parking lot for 5 days,

getting rained on,

possibly run over

and who knows what else.

I mean, maybe even an unsuspecting guy picked the Nesbitt up thinking it was his,

only to try it on later at home realizing that all the information on the Nesbitt was not his.




It was a strange Nesbitt belonging to someone else.

And he’d had it on his wrist!

So maybe this man,

this poor freaked out “I-didn’t-mean-to-steal-your-Nesbitt” possible man, 

took it back to the parking lot he found it in Monday morning 

and discreetly tossed it on the ground hoping that whoever lost it would be on the lookout for it.

Heaven forbid he take it to Lost & Found or anything.

It’s the revenge of The Pants With No One Inside Them!

Click on the link above
if you are lost.

“I said I was sorry he lost his Nesbitt.
In the parking lot with no one inside it.
I said and said and said I’m sorry,
I said it but I lied it."


**When pulling up an image of the Nesbitt, the website said this version was no 
longer being sold because of a voluntary callback due to rashes and a faulty snap.**

22 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Cari,

      Thanks! So glad to be following your blog now. My girls love to make their own bath products.

      Delete
  2. Reading this made me happy - there is no Nesbitt in our house...

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    Replies
    1. Yes, be VERY happy there is no Nesbitt in your house!

      Delete
  3. HAHA This made me laugh so hard!

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  4. Hilarious story!! That would drive me absolutely CRAZY- but you are so right- Monte could be doing countless other things that are sooooo much worse! Too bad these magical tech bracelets don't have an ID with contact info on them... pff.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chris,

      You’d think! It is on its way home now. Waiting to see if it still works…?!?!

      Delete
  5. Oh how cute! I laughed out loud when you said the dog thought it was a really boring game....

    Cute post! I am an empty nester now, so I am re-living all those wonderful aggravating moments.

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    Replies
    1. Christine,

      Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment!

      Delete
  6. OMG! Get Mr. B and your hubs in a room together and they could effect the space/ time continum! Mr. B is the same way, a dog with a bone is what I call it :-) I may look into getting him a Nesbitt though, just to fill the time when he isn't over-thinking something LOL!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kathe,

      A dog with a bone! That made me laugh! Ha! Thanks for reading!

      Delete
  7. I can relate to this completely - my son is a techno addict and has to have every piece of new technology that comes out. Lately he got on a fitness kick and has started jogging - everyday the UPS or FedEx man is at our door with another new gadget to help him track his new regime - it is so funny but, then he has to show you on his new gadgets just how far he has run this week and so on, yaddah, yaddah.....Maybe we should introduce these two....

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    Replies
    1. Cathy,

      Yes! Techno-geeks unite! Ha! We get lots of gadget and cord deliveries here too! So funny how similar they sound.

      Delete
  8. What an adorable blog and I love this post. I am so glad you found me so I could find you! Lovely.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I asked Steve to get me a "Nesbitt" or something equivalent to it for my birthday. I love how you tell a story.

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  10. Karmen!
    You just reminded me that Monte bought me a cheaper smaller version of th Nesbitt (it’s green) that I clip onto my pants. It’s always popping off when I use the bathroom (a few near tragic disasters) so I don’t use it like I should. When I do, I love to see just how many steps it takes me to grocery shop. It’s crazy!!! No wonder I hate to do it. But it doesn’t recognize when I am on the bike. Which frustrates me. Anyhoo…thanks for reading!

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  11. Husbands are weird! Mine totally does the "walk around the house" thing is he doesn't get enough steps in! Or he does toe touches on a soccer ball in the living room. Last time he did that I was in the basement doing laundry and I heard this awful banging, so I yelled upstairs for the kids to "cut out that noise!" Then he yelled back and said it was him. I think I embarrassed him.

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  12. Hahahaha......I can so relate to the annoyance that comes with an overly obsessed, health nut husband. Loved this post!

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  13. So funny - and so happy you brought up the whole "The pants with no one inside them" because just seeing the title has me giggling. So nice of your husband to have these events that you can blog about : )

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