Winter Gone Wild

You know, it seems as if everything is just a bit off kilter with all this snow and crazy cold and the fact that we haven't seen the actual asphalt of our road in over a week.

Or the mouth and eyes of our snowman.

Poor thing.

It did have a mouth and eyes at one time.

Warning:  using black jelly beans for
snowman eyes and mouth will cause bleeding.
Like the makeup of Carol Burnett when she
played the aging silent movie star,
Nora Desmond.

Am I right?

Monte left early Tuesday morning on a business trip.

I asked him what I should do if I spotted a coyote in our yard while Nigel was out there doing what he needed to do.

Without hesitation Monte said,

"Grab a pot and bang on it."

Me:  "That's what you would do if you saw a coyote outside right now? 

You'd grab a pot and bang on it?"

Monte:  "No, I'd kick it."

Me:  "You'd kick a coyote?"

Monte:  "Absolutely, to save my dog and protect my family."

Then there was a show of muscle flexing and fist making.

I decided to do some research on The Google because it seemed as if everyone in town had pictures of coyotes in their backyard or one very near them.

This problem was real. 

And it wasn't going away.

Not a big cat.

Nor were there 10TV helicopters 

dedicated to tracking their whereabouts.

Google told me that basically Monte was right.
(But a little wrong too).

Coyotes are skittish creatures not so much into sticking around for the loud noises of singing, screaming or pot banging.

As long as you stare right into their eyes while you do it--

to show dominance.

Never, under any circumstance, 

should you take off running 

or kick them.

The night before Monte's business trip McDaniel's basketball team won in overtime.

It was one of those games that, as the sweet grandfather of one of the players put it,

"Got my pacemaker pumping!"

We treated McDaniel and one of her teammates out to a victory dinner afterward--their pick.

They chose KFC.

I will get a salad, I sighed to myself.

The very cheery lady behind the counter informed me that cole slaw was the extent of their salad choices.

So I ordered a chicken breast.

They were out of chicken breasts.

In fact, they were basically out of most of their chicken items.

So I ordered a chicken pot pie.

They were out of it.

I told the cheery lady she needed to help me.

So she suggested the cole slaw.

(again)

And a grilled thigh.

(…yum?)

And oddly enough, cake.

We wondered as we made our way to our seats, how an establishment known for chicken could become so depleted of it.

We decided that the C of KFC was less about the chicken and more about the cole slaw and cake that night.

I am sure coyotes played in there somewhere.

And most definitely the cold.