Monday, February 10, 2014

Weary and Entertainment Starved

I woke up to the sound of helicopters this morning around 6:15ish.

Half-dreaming, half-awake, I rationalized the obvious circling that the helicopter was doing

over 

and over 

and over, 

what seemed to be RIGHT ABOVE OUR HOUSE,

as a search for coyotes.

Because that is what you do in a city neighborhood when coyotes are starving because the winter has been the coldest and longest and involving so much snow and they start eating little dogs in their very own backyards.

I know.

Can you even imagine?!

It happened. 

I heard it on Facebook.

Or was it the news?

It was definitely in a text from Carisa 
begging us to watch Nigel closely 
as he does his business outside.

Good thing he is white and blends in nicely with the snow.

Anyway,

my brain made it rational for our local news to "track" the coyote's whereabouts via helicopter.

In the dark. 

For good TV, of course.

McDaniel came in our room and asked if the Russians were trying to bomb us

via helicopter.

Thank you, Monte, for giving the detailed and impassioned 
Cold War history lecture during the opening ceremonies of 
the Winter Olympics in Russia.

RABBIT TRAIL:  Is anyone else having trouble "getting into" the Winter Olympics this year?


Maybe it is because this has already been like the LONGEST winter and watching MORE of anything winter seems like it is making it even longer.

Or maybe it is because I saw it was 55 degrees in Sochi yesterday and it was 18 degrees here in Ohio. Yeah, I was slightly jealous of Russia.

But mainly I think it is because I am a child of the 80s where we were taught very real things about the Cold War and "pushing the button" and the odds of surviving a nuclear bomb (not good) and "I will break you" said by Drago in Rocky IV was really more of political statement than a boxing one.


ALL THAT TO SAY, I can't love watching a host to our Olympians that I have been taught want to end our way or life or at least take it over completely.

I searched the Internet and found out that a water main had broken very nearby and flooded a busy road,

thus icing it over, 

thus making it unnavigable. 

Film at 11.

From the sound of it, a LOT of film at 11.

Can I just say that my coyote story or even the Russian one would've made better television than watching cars slide off the road as water shoots out of a broken pipe?

That is so. last. week.

Not that I want either of those scenarios to happen, please no, Lord, but it has been a long winter.

We are weary and entertainment starved.

That has been very noticeable in our local news when a fuzzy picture of an animal flashed on the screen with the title of Big Cat Spotted.



Except it wasn't a big cat.

What was thought to have been a bobcat turned out to be a coyote. 

(See--I did hear it on the news and not just Facebook or Carisa!).


Seems a little bit like another show:



We are cold and bored and can't go anywhere because there is snow and frozen water everywhere and our dogs are possibly going to be eaten by coyotes.

My mom texted me that a hawk has positioned itself in a tree behind their house so as to "pick off" any bird that dares to belly up to the feeder my dad keeps stocked for them.

Not. Pretty.

But certainly more interesting than the mistaken identity of a bobcat/coyote, 
especially since none of them turned out to be Big Foot.

The local news also reported a wreck in a little town about an hour away. The wreck happened on Coonpath Road. 

That entertained me to no end. 

(see how desperate I am?)

Especially since my girlfriend grew up in that town.

Of course I had to text her immediately and she did indeed remember Coonpath Road.

It was the road she took to the pool in the summer.

Summer. Ahhhh.

Remember that?

Big cats aren't mistaken for coyotes in summer.

Water main breaks don't get 30 minutes of film footage from a news crew helicopter in summer.

People don't slide off icy roads and crash into poles on Coonpath Road in the summer.

Right?

Don't ruin this for me.

I am like Olaf the snowman singing of summer in the movie Frozen,


blissfully 
hopeful 
and ignorant.




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