Adventures On Rainy Days Part 2

Okay, back to our rainy day adventures.

I last left you at the African Safari when we were feeding the giraffes and zebras.

They concluded the drive-through portion of the safari.

We parked so that we could enjoy the walk-through portion of the safari AND the pig races.

Our car looked like this:

That is a LOT of buffalo slobber.

We noticed an area where you could vacuum all the stray pieces of feed from your car.

But no car wash. 

We added OPEN A CAR WASH INSIDE OF OR DIRECTLY ACROSS THE STREET FROM THE AFRICAN SAFARI to our "Million Dollar Ideas" list.

It is a lengthy mental list with items we've never put into action
like:  "Open a Waffle House down the road from our house."

We walked around the zoo-like portion of the safari ever so briefly because the pig races were set to start 

and there were only 3 shows a day 

and we were NOT missing them.

NASPIG Racing, thank you very much.

Check out the names of the pig racers in the photo below underneath the START sign:

Yes, both girls have on sweatshirts from the gift shop of our lodge. It was cold.
And we were bored. 

 They are:

Pig Daddy

Mario Spamdretti

A.J. Oink

and Dale Swinehardt Jr.

Now I am no NASCAR fan but I recognized some of those names

and I appreciated the cleverness.

I desperately needed it as a 

ray of sunshine for our cloudy vacation.

 So I bet in my mind on Pig Daddy

mainly because he was adorable. 

All pink and splotchy black.

I don't know--he could've been fast.

 Right before the race started there was a hog calling contest. The emcee was asking for volunteers.

As Monte's hand started to go up in the air,

the girls begged,

PLEADED 

for me to intervene.

But this was cloudy/rainy DAY NUMBER 3 of our vacation

and I REALLY needed to hear Monte's interpretation of a hog call.

But alas, the girls got their way.

Mainly because Monte realized that there were mostly little kids in line to try out their call except for one guy and quite honestly, he looked like a jerk standing there because, come on, let the kids have this one.

Right before the race started the emcee announced that A.J. Oink had been disqualified due to a "pork chop incident"

har dee har har.

Flags were waved and the race FINALLY began. 

Pig Daddy remained in his cage seemingly eating something.

Or looking for something to eat.

He was almost lapped before he moseyed on out of his caged.

It was deeply disappointing. 

Can you see Pig Daddy pretty much walking in dead last?

After the race, Monte had a hankering for some pork

I know

he thinks he's funny.

So we walked around quickly viewing the reindeer, warthogs and vultures and monkeys until we hit the gift shop.

The girls pooled their money and preyed upon our weak resolve to end up with these:

Ellie named her giraffe, wait for it,
Mr. Giraffe.

McDaniel named hers, to frustrate Monte,
 Baby.

After the gift shop, we stood in line for the snack shack.

Incidentally, they served Bratwurst so Monte got his pork

which he became convinced was in fact A.J. Oink.

NASPIG racing is rough, people.

While we were getting our food we started hearing the loudest, craziest commotion

like sirens or screaming.

We looked around to see what kids were making the noise 

or using what purchases from the gift shop.

The teen aged snack shack girl nonchalantly said,

"Oh, those are the monkeys. 
They do that when it is going to rain."

Untitled from Karmen Hartranft on Vimeo.

So we got lunch AND the local forecast.

Back at the lodge, the sun decided to shine during dinner so we rushed out to rent paddle boats.

This is a shot of the girls before they paddled right into the fountain. 

They got soaked.

The next morning we ate at a diner as we were leaving town.

The waitress sat us at a booth with a pole positioned right where one would slide into the seating.

There were many other booths available.

We decided to not speak up and maybe just consider it part of the adventure or possibly a compliment in some way.

Maybe:

•We were perceived young and agile enough 

to do the squeeze and slide-in.

•We were perceived thin enough (before eating) 

to do the squeeze and slide-in.

We were HUNGRY and ordered big meals with multiple sides and extras.

As I closed the menu and handed it back to the waitress, I read the words CASH ONLY on the front of  it.

Monte realized he only had $23 in his wallet. 

McDaniel announced her meal alone 

may have totalled more than that.

So he quickly did the squeeze and slide-in out of our booth to go find a bank to get more cash. 

Incidentally, Ellie had an ECLAIR pancake. Creamy custard and all.

It was culinary genius.

Monte made it back in time to eat and pay and no one had to wash dishes.

As we headed home, 

we noticed a gynecological office 

that was actually just a house.

I added DON'T EVER GO TO A GYNECOLOGICAL OFFICE THAT IS JUST A HOUSE to the other mental list we keep.

The one simply called:  "DON'T EVER".

Monte adds to that list the most:

"Don't ever bring home a boy that calls me dude."

"Don't ever bring home a boy that has a head tattoo."

That kind of thing.

We laughed and laughed on the way home about this vacation we had just taken:

with rain rain that wouldn't go away

hikes in a mostly dead forest

walleyball

funnel cake fries

nuclear plants

agressive buffalo

an angry yak

NASPIG racing

meteorological monkeys

soggy paddle boat rides

a squeeze and slide-in diner booth
(that only takes cash)

and lady doctors who work out of a house.

You know, God is so faithful.

He knows how I delight in these adventures.

And He is so good to keep them coming.