Mothering

It happens in so many different ways

this "mothering"

whether it is the way we mother our kids

or the way we are mothered by our own.

Or both.

I was at a graduation party yesterday

in the middle of a conversation with a friend

when out of the corner of my eye

(who am I kidding?

I flat out full-faced stared)

while the mother of the hostess

picked up a color-coordinated decorative napkin

walked up to the lamp that was on the buffet table

and began to dust all up in the lamp.

The room was packed with people.

From my vantage point

I could see all the dust particles unleash onto the cookie platter 

and bowls of peanut M&Ms below on the table.

I found it

so. funny.

It was one part sweet:

"Let me help you out, sweetie."

One part rude:

"Let me help you out, sweetie, since you clearly

didn't take the time to dust."

One part just funny:

"Oh, that story is just so interesting, but I am having trouble focusing since there is SO MUCH DUST 

all up in that lamp over there."

I had forgotten all about it until my friend texted me last night to find out if I had seen the lamp dusting.

I delighted in the moment MORE knowing she had seen it too!

Heaven knows, the Lord protected us from knowing the other knew lest I turned around, gave her the look and we both ended up on the floor laughing.

Or worse.

We made her mom feel bad.

It was not taken as an offense

which was the lighthearted luxury of the entire situation.

On this very same weekend my other friend was having a not so hot visit with her mother

that wasn't funny or lighthearted a single bit.

I started getting the prayer request texts Sunday night

for strength and patience 

and for the Lord to give her the ability to honor her mother

or just flat out staple her tongue to the floor

whichever was the easiest for the Lord 

to get the results HE intended.

(Ok, I added that part.)

It struck me curious that sometimes this "mothering" isn't fair.

I can't imagine a strained weekend with my own mother.

Heck, I am trying to get more weekends WITH my mother.

She lives in another state 4 hours away.

I'd help her and Dad pack 

if they'd just sell the house 

and move closer already!

My mom and Ellie this past Christmas
wearing Ellie's presents on their heads.

I am acutely aware that this isn't my friend's position on her mother.

Mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted

my friend couldn't wait to wave good-bye to her mother's visit.

I am sure I will get the details later but it doesn't matter if I do.

I want to BE GRATEFUL for what I have

a light heart when it comes to my mother 

because of the way she mothered me.

Speaking of mothering:  I had to stop writing this post because of the panicked plea from upstairs:

"Mom! I need you NOW!"

There was a very fast and dramatic descriptive presented of the sheer enormity and ferociousness of the bug waiting just inside the shower curtain.

It was a convincing tale. 

I heard myself say,

"Come with me! Don't make me go in alone!"

Because I'm crazy courageous like that.

So I killed this 1,000 legged part bug, part dragon with a large bubble wand that someone handed me like a scalpel in an operating room.

It was all funny

in a heart palpitating screaming kind of way.

And we celebrated as I used the shower nozzle 

to hose 400 of the dismembered 

part bug, part dragon 

legs down the tub drain.

I hope my girls will remember these funny days in the future

when they receive me with open arms

into their homes

and I decide to pick up a decorative color-coordinated napkin

in a room full of people

and begin to dust the underside of a lamp

all over the cookie platters.