Monday, September 14, 2015

Dead Plant Dreams

I had a very vivid dream last week.

Monte and I were renting a room from an older couple.

I’m not sure where our daughters were in this dream.
Or what circumstance led us to the situation 
of renting a room in the house of an older couple.

Especially an older couple that seemed hostile towards us.

We had to go out of town and when we came back all our plants were dead.

I don’t mean house plants but outside in the ground plants.

Plants that were right next to the older couple’s alive and well-watered plants.

It infuriated me.

I sarcastically spoke to the older man,

“Thanks a lot for taking such good care 
of my plants when we were gone!”

He said to me with no emotion,

“You didn’t ask me to water your plants.”

I fired back,

“It took such EFFORT for you to NOT water my plants!”

I had such a clear visual image of him going out of his way 
to make sure the garden hose didn’t get one single tiny drop of water
on any of my plants.

He replied again that I should’ve asked him.

I said something about not having to because it was 
in the bible to love your neighbor!

Did I mention the man was wearing a dippy looking quilted leather hat?
My dream self showed great restraint in not mentioning that 
after the “love your neighbor” comment.

I woke up mad from this dream.

Of course I had to wake up Monte and tell him 

all about the mean man 

and my dead plants 

and how totally ticked off this all made me.

It nagged at an old wound for us,

this dream about neglect
and frustration
and not feeling honored.

Familiar old feelings of betrayal 
rushed back to the surface.

After the girls left for school, I opened a devotion that is emailed to me daily.

This is the image that popped up on my phone:

It was such affirmation for me.

I need to look to God and God alone 
to nourish my thirsty plants/soul.

Not man, like in my dream.

God wants me to flourish

To bear fruit in my old age and to stay fresh and green.

I can’t look to man to do that for me.

Because man is deeply flawed.

And will always disappoint me.

But I also can’t let bitterness from the past 
to choke out my fresh and green plans for the future.

The rest of the verse in Psalm 92:12-15 says:

“The LORD is upright; he is my Rock, and there is no wickedness in him.” 

It was reassuring and thirst-quenching to read after my dream.

God is good.

God is for me.

God is always, absolutely 100% good.

And also for the day after my dream
 which was September 11th.

1 comment:

  1. Good is good. God is for me. Hanging on tight to those promises right now.


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