Thursday, June 20, 2013


The idea of "fairness" keeps coming up in our lives.

My oldest daughter got her ears pierced when she was in the 5th grade.

So Ellie just got her ears pierced in the 5th grade.

McDaniel got a cell phone in the 6th grade after she made the honor roll.

So she just assumed that Ellie would do the same.

Well, we are starting to give Ellie a little bit more independence this summer and Monte and I are starting to feel like she might need a cell phone a little earlier than McDaniel did.

To give us peace of mind that we can stay in touch.

McDaniel is having a hissy fit over that.

"It. Just. Isn't. Fair".

Mind you, we have done nothing more than discuss the matter.
And she has absolutely no say in our final decision.

Before the end of the school year, Ellie's class studied the concept of Fair Trade.

Except, as it turns out, it still isn't completely fair.

The bigger kid always manages to figure out a way to play "keep away" from the little guy.

Even when the little guy didn't sign up to play.

Things in business and in life simply aren't fair.

I grew up in a family that did a pretty good job of keeping things "fairly" fair.
(Pun intended)

In fact, my youngest brother thinks my parents did too good of a job with the fairness thing.

So much so that he felt completely ill-equipped 
to handle the utter unfairness of the world.

I haven't forgotten that.

As a parent we need to teach kindness 
and compassion and some idea of fairness.

At the same time we need to let them know that life just. isn't. fair.

And they can't be devastated by it.

Or jaded by it.

The world wants us to begin seeing everyone just the same

in an attempt at making life fair.

The ultimate Fair Trade Act, if you will.

But God made each of us so unique

and each of us in His image.

Just imagine what seeing Him will be like.

Will we instantly recognize loved ones in His face?

You know, who were made in His image?

Will we see ourselves somewhere in His majestic eyes?

I have never thought of any of us looking alike in heaven.

Like mass-produced beings with the same features and mannerisms and talents.

So why should we here?

Sarah Young writes in Jesus Calling (based on Psalm 5:11; Ephesians 3:20-21; Jude 24-25; Joshua 1:5),

"I am the firm foundation on which you can dance and sing and celebrate My Presence. This is My high and holy calling for you; receive it as a precious gift. Glorifying and enjoying Me is a higher priority than maintaining a tidy, structured life. Give up your striving to keep everything under control--an impossible task and a waste of precious energy.

My guidance for each of My children is unique. That's why listening to Me is so vital for your well-being. Let me prepare you for the day that awaits you and point you in the right direction. I am with you continually, so don't be intimidated by fear. Though it stalks you, it cannot harm you, as long as you cling to My hand. Keep your eyes on Me, enjoying Peace in My Presence."


God guides each of His children in unique ways!

There can't be a complete fair "One for you and one for you and one for you" kind of deal.

And we wouldn't want that.

Because their would never have been any of the great stories in the bible.

It wasn't fair that Joseph was the favored child of his father

and only he got that snazzy jacket

or that his brothers sold him off as a slave

or that he spent time in jail for a crime he didn't do.

Yet God saw fit to make him the king's right hand man.

God asks us to dance and sing and celebrate Him.

And you KNOW that HE KNOWS that we are each going to do that completely differently.

All this to say,

we can't raise our children the same.

Rules apply differently.

Their circumstances are unique.

God's treatment of us is a great model of that.
Ladies Only Blog Share


  1. Great post! Life isn't fair but I am so glad that God has a way to deal with each of us individuals in His own creative way, unique for each one. Your daughters are blessed that their mama understands this well : )

  2. Thanks, Mindy! My girls may not agree but hopefully they will understand.
    You made my mouth water with your guest post!! Yummo on the salad recipe!

  3. How often I heard "that's not fair" from my children and now from my grandchildren. And I realize that I have the same feelings at times. But you shared lots of relevant thoughts in this post. Life isn't fair from our standpoint, but it's obviously best for us.

  4. Gail,

    I certainly struggle with "that's not fair!" in my own heart. I needed the reminder that it isn't supposed to be as much as my girls. Love your devotion for today: "The best and the worst things about me are both true." Wow and…ouch!

  5. Great post! Would love to have you link it up at our Ladies Only Blog Share party! We have a summer theme this week, but general topics are welcomed, too. :) Visiting from Freedom Fridays blog hop!

  6. I've been thinking a lot about fairness lately, and I'm so glad you shared this. I'm thankful that God does NOT give us what is fair. He gives so much more than that.

  7. Great post! I hear it all the time from my kids but sometimes you just have to weigh what works best at that point in time. My daughter got her cell phone at a younger age than either of her two brothers, but it was because she was involved in activities where she wasn't with us all the time and we felt like it was important for her to have one. It all depends on the situation and over time it all seems to even itself out! Visiting from the Ladies Only Blog Share - thanks for linking up with us!

  8. Beautifully said--and so true! Thanks for sharing this wisdom. :)

  9. If life was fair, we'd get what we deserve. And as sinners, what we deserve is eternity in hell.

    THANK GOD that he is not fair!! Instead, Jesus took the punishment that WE deserve and gave us HIS righteousness.

    Excellent post! :)


Just Another Rat Story

Happy Summer! Our summer started with Monte and I sitting on the back patio after dinner chatting while a rat ran across our yard. This...