Tuesday, October 06, 2020

The Time Monte Got Stuck on a Chain Link Fence at a Field Hockey Game

McDaniel is a coaching a JV high school field hockey team.

She's never played. 

And knew very little about the game 

walking in.

Her team had a game just 30 minutes away from us so we drove to watch it Saturday.

It was an over 2-hour drive on the bus for her and her team so I decided to make each of them snacks bags for after the game and on the way home.

Snacks for 20 ended up filling a few leftover Amazon boxes.

The set up on this football field/track was bizarre and included lots of locked chain link fences.

We drove to where the bus was parked right by the track to see if we could get to the team on the other side from there.

Nope.

Monte hopped the fence and we handed him the boxes.

On the way back over, he struggled.

McDaniel couldn't watch and walked away towards the car.

I looked back to find Monte stuck in a straddle position over the fence.

I quickly joined McDaniel by the car.

We laughed.

After awhile, Monte marched towards us with a grumpy face.

"I'm hurt" he said.

Then he turned around to reveal an enormous rip in the hind end of his jeans.

Is this inappropriate?

The entire pocket was flapping in the wind 

revealing the color of his underwear.

Which wasn't white.

I can't remember if I fell down or leaned over or just blacked out from laughing.

Monte was mad.

His jeans were new

 and he really liked them 

and he just wanted McDaniel 

and I to see if he was bleeding.


McDaniel muttered something about refusing to look at her father's behind in a high school parking lot.

It was all up to me.

Reassuringly, I saw no blood and then told Monte to take off his jacket, tie it around his waist so we could walk all the way around the stadium and track to deliver the snacks he had earlier set by the fence.

Can you hear me laughing?



We got to visit with McDaniel during the varsity game and sat off by ourselves while her team enjoyed the snacks.

Three girls came over and asked McDaniel permission to go to the bus to get a blanket.

We watched as they walked around the track, forgetting to warn them that the gate was locked.

We saw one of the girls jump the fence. 

McDaniel worried since she had concussion.

We watched intently as the girl tried unsuccessfully to get back over the fence--almost exactly where Monte had torn the back end of his pants.

All of a sudden, an older gentleman emerged from the bus (one of those big charter ones) and helped the girl with ease right on over the fence.

Monte exclaimed,

"The bus driver was in the bus the entire time?! 

He could've helped me?? 

Why didn't he offer to help me?!"

I envisioned the bus driver trying to take a little nap when the ruckus of shaking chain link caused him to open his eyes to see Monte stuck in a straddle on top of the fence. 

I'm sure he got caught up in wanting to see how this situation was going to play out. He might have even recorded it just to make sure the bus drivers back at home believed it really happened.

The whole thing was funny all over again.

Until we got home and Monte made me check 

for a "flesh wound" 

in the middle of the kitchen.




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