Toddler Tired

In the midst of hosting family from out of town,

we decided to host whoever wanted to come over at 5:00 am 

to watch the Royal Wedding Saturday morning.

Ellie's sweet Young Life leader showed up.

I woke up at 4:45 to make tea and set out muffins, mini cinnamon rolls and fruit tarts.

There was NARY A SCONE to be had in this town.

I didn't realize that at 5:00 am it was mainly just watching the guests arrive and that it would be SOME TIME before we actually saw Meghan in her wedding dress.

The girls dozed at various points in the service and I was super glad my cousin was up early for a run to watch the fantastic Bishop Michael Curry's spirited message with me.

The wedding was beautiful, Meghan was stunning and I'm glad we got up to watch it.

After everyone left, we made breakfast for our company and then Monte and I decided to go for a long walk, 

which turned into running stadium stairs,

which turned into push-ups and sit-ups,

which turned into us running home in a DOWN POUR,

which turned into us just walking and laughing because running didn't keep us dry at all.

We were SOAKED.

After showering, I was pretty jazzed and decided to run a quick errand to look for new athletic shoes.

Not just because mine were soaking wet at home.

Somewhere during walking around the shoe store and trying a few pairs on, I hit a wall of tired.

Hard.

Monte had brought me a pair of shoes that he thought would be fantastic for me (i.e. cheap) and they felt like cement blocks on my feet.

I bent down to untie them and I just. couldn't.

I laid on the floor of the shoe store with my feet in the air SAYING NO WORDS.

Monte took my shoes off and we left.

On the way to the car I told him how I had a new understanding of why toddlers throw themselves on the floor when they get tired.

IT FELT PRETTY FANTASTIC!

Monte and I both agreed I needed a nap PRONTO.

It was around that time that I realized I had missed a call.

The name of the caller reminded me that I had committed to making several dozen cookies that day.

I almost cried.

Somehow, by the grace of God, I made close to 72 million cookies without crying.

Or throwing myself on the floor.

Then I made dinner.

All without a nap.

It's amazing what a lack of sleep does.

I felt cross-eyed.

I have a new appreciation for parents of newborns.

And for older parents of newborns.

But mostly for the people that live like this 

ALL. THE. TIME.

People that cram so much into each day that there is no time to sit and enjoy it.

There's always something else to go to, 

to say yes to,

to do, do, do.

My small group just discussed this idea of recharging.

Figuring out where all the pressures we are under are coming from.

Which ones we can get out from under 

so we can be more fully charged 

for what is the most important.

We are reading Priscilla Shirer's Fervent and she suggested that the many pressures in our our lives can resemble slavery.

"Slaves don't rest.
Slaves just work.
They don't control their agenda for the day;
the day's agenda controls them."

When we start thinking we CAN'T say no, 

then well, we are talking like a slave.

We are free.

We DO have the freedom to say no.

To allow ourselves space in our day to be still, 

to go to bed at a reasonable time, 

to be sensitive to what our body and mind are saying 

when it's cross-eyed tired.

I still don't think I have fully recovered because it's May and May is its own form of toddler tired without the royal wedding.

But I've planned some margin in my week to allow me some downtime to recharge for what I know will be a busy weekend.

Because of just a few no's,  I saw a frog outside my window this morning while I was watering my flowers.

I noticed the first peony of the season.

 I watched flags being installed along the sidewalks by a school for Memorial Day on my walk.

And I listened to an awesome sermon about Jesus coming to us 

in the midst of the storm.

I think my head planter I got for Mother's Day perfectly sums up my current mood.